Shabbat Nachamu

Shabbat Nachamu, this past Shabbat, is the first in a series of seven special shabbatot with haftarot of conciliation. Shabbat Nachamu, named for the week's Haftarah portion, signifies the start of the build-up to Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, a start to the end of oppression and to a new life. However, this year I don't feel comforted. I am not commanded to be comforted, and if I am, I disobey a commandment. I want to wallow in my grief. I need to wallow in my grief.