#20 - The Art of Public Prayer: Not for Clergy Only

This book, by Lawrence A. Hoffman, sets up the current state of public prayer in America as a problem. The author sees that many attend worship sessions which are unfulfilling. He poses as a solution looking at public prayer as a sacred drama. A good, quick read, which may be interesting to some.

A big distance in small steps

It has now been more than six years since my beloved passed, more than six years since I have heard her voice for real, more than six years since I have felt her loving hand in mine. But even as I struggle to keep her memory alive, I know that I must move on.

#19 - Lesbian Rabbis: The First Generation

Edited by Rebecca T. Alpert, Sue Levi Elwell, and Shirley Idelson, this anthology of the experiences of 18 lesbian rabbis has been most instructive to me as I come closer to applying to rabbinical school myself. To read the experiences of the queer rabbis that are my heroines in the way they have faced adversity has helped me hone in on what makes me want to be a rabbi. Although this book may not be for everyone, it has been well read by yours truly.

Shaving

I am in the closet at work. Since there are no protections in South Bend, or for that matter, the state of Indiana, I decided to closet myself to be on the safe side. I do not fear backlash from my co-workers, but rather backlash from the parents of the kids were they to find out about my sexuality.

Anyway, I'm trying to be a little less visible than normal. In other words, I am trying to pass as heterosexual. It's not that hard, given that most of my coworkers assume the heterosexuality of everyone they know unless told otherwise.

Thus, shaving. Mostly, I've been wearing long pants and t-shirts to work. However, free swim days necessitate that I shave because society states that straight women shave their armpits and their legs. (Yes, I recognize this is not universal practice among straight women.)

Shaving saps my strength. The first time I shaved all summer, I was exhausted for the rest of the day. I think the act of passing intentionally is magnified by actions it requires, and passing is much more painful when done intentionally than unintentionally. Thus, by shaving, I was actively passing as opposed to letting myself pass, and I let the pain take away my energy.

#18 - Synagogue Life

This book is a study of the functionings of an modern Orthodox synagogue. It is very interesting, yet dense. My interest in communal prayer ritual led to a recommendation of this book by my adviser. Heilman, an Orthodox Jew himself, writes about his community with respect and a certain amount of detachment. The book is highly interesting, but I would only recommend going out of your way to read it if you already share interest in one of the many subjects covered therein, which range from the functions of the gabbai to the social implications of gossip.